At least Elijah wasn’t just running away. At least he wound up in the place we all do eventually when we’ve lost our own sense of faith or direction—in the presence of God, having to answer the question, “Why are you here?”

The question echoes throughout the cave and through Elijah’s heart, as if there is someplace else the Lord might have expected him to be. Does God expect Elijah to be able to admit that fear set him on this journey?

Elijah tries out the stiff words of the speech he’s composed for this moment. The language is flimsy and awkward: “I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts.” He must know how flimsy it sounds. And yet he tries it again, this time into God’s very face. This time, he speaks it into the silence that allows for no illusions.

Why is Elijah here? Because God saved him. That’s why. Because when Elijah flees without food or drink, messengers of the Lord keep him alive, giving him food, water, and direction, even when he has no will to seek it on his own.

If Elijah is asking for protection, his request is not clear. For instead of further respite, the Lord sends him back to the world of human politics, back to the work of a prophet.

In the silent place we come to after fleeing what we fear, God will not hesitate to send us back into the world. God’s need for our action is greater than our human need to feel safe. But sometimes we need the noise of our doubts and voices of our enemies to be silenced in order to figure that out.